Do confident people experience negative self talk sometimes?

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While I can’t speak for anyone else, from what I have experienced, there is always the potential for negative self talk.

What I do is to take massive action, in spite of the negative self talk, and not just hope that the negative self talk goes away.

A habit is formed in not listening to the negativity, and these “weeds of negativity” in your mind are starved of your attention.

When you make a decision to pursue what you think is the best course of action, sometimes things don’t always work out as you would have liked.

This may cause you to second guess yourself when there are future decisions to be made.

What you are experiencing in terms of thinking that you are confused and not strong can be handled/managed. It may take time and having more decisions being made.

 I offer these two suggestions for your consideration:

1.Review the outcome of the decision and what your fears/negative thoughts were dwelling on. Were you thinking a lot worse about a situation than it actually is?

2. For future major decisions, you can request the participation from two or three other persons who can provide advice/differing viewpoints on the issues to be considered and what should be done. At the end, the decision is still yours to make, but you would have used a more robust process to analyse the pros/cons.

What is a good way to boost your confidence? 

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This answer would depend on the situation(s) that you would like to have greater confidence in, or the person(s) around which you would like to be more confident.

A general suggestion that may span a range of possible circumstances is as follows:

Learn to play the game of chess. If or when you can play, aim to play at least one game a day using a chess app at the hardest setting or play with a live opponent that is much better than you are.

Keep on getting pummeled, but if you go through the process and stay in it long enough, at some point, you would be hitting back just as hard as you were getting hit before.

Your abilities in chess would get better and you may find that some of the areas of improvement transfer to aspects that relate to courage, self control and confidence.

What about if you are just not into chess.  What then ?

Then let us consider the question raised before, and pose it in a different way.

What are the levels of confidence and the degrees of positivity that you would like to have on a consistent basis?

Given that you may be some at interval from where you would like to be, then you have to take strong and consistent and effective actions.

Take steps or pursue activities where you get nervous at the final outcome, or where you can embarrass yourself or where someone might disagree with you in a very public way.

These are three examples of the means through which you can develop your inner strength and courage.

The more you get outside of your comfort zone, the closer you can potentially get to the objectives that you seek.

But please be mindful of destroying the confidence of another person in your pursuit to bolster your own confidence.

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One of the surefire ways to destroy the confidence of another person is to publicly criticize, in a cruel and crass manner , what the person has done, or how it was done.

Yeah, do not do that.   This is an unnecessary way to operate, in my opinion.

Ending Remarks

Keep on growing and pushing yourself, and you would continue to enhance your confidence.

Take things “one step at a time”.

What helps you to do ‘one thing at a time’?

Using a “To Do” List. The items on your list gets done “one at a time”.

Having a means of tracking the completion of your list of items by placing a strikethrough is very convenient and clear.

Either there is a strikethrough or there isn’t. There is no “one quarter strikethrough” or “one half strikethrough”.

I wish you great success on the journeys that lie ahead of you.

 

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